The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
