I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I've blown a few things in my day
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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