I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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