before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
