oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
