Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
