hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
The feeling are messing with the penis
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
