Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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