the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
