I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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