Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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