can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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