just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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