I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
