i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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