If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
