I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
