went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
