Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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