It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
