take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
