Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
