the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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