I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
