your room smells of hookers.
And success
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
