Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
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