I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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