That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize