Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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