O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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