So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
