I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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