I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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