8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I just found puke in my bra..
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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