Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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