No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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