It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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