Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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