you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
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