Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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