well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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