Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
