NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Found your dick twin last night
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
