Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
