apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
