This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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