Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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