OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
