I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
