The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
